so we talk once and a while to catch up on our lives that weve moved on with despite distance and failed friendship. and sometimes we pretend to make plans together. and sometimes we talk and sometimes we dig up the past. but most of the time its just me sitting around and thinking about the past i would like to dig up if i ever caught you in themiddle of a moment when you would be obligated to hang out with me. eventually ill get older and ill stop playing these games with myself. and ill take my life with a grain of salt. and someday i will be able to go outside and take a deep breath and not think about you. because right now even if its just a fleeting moment, you manage to sneak out from your hiding place in the back of my mind where i dotn even notice you sitting and scream into plain view. and then once youre there you rarely ever go back into hiding until youre possitive youve sucked out every single memory from me. icould go on for hours. about you, or the next, or the last. and there was no point ot this post. it wasnt good writing. i'm sick. i feel like death.