For my next trick...

I would like to be better at living

how am i not myself

do what you can, with what you have, where you are.

talking in circles

The ever-lingering bad mood is exhausting and infectious.

the time is meow

I believe that birthdays, like New Year's Eve and St. Patrick's Day, are often over-hyped and usually disappointing.

Additionally, Craigslist sellers should never refer to whatever it is they are selling as "stunning." Things for sale on Craigslist and "Stunning Things" are mutually exclusive.

I am the biggest cynic I know. Being my friend is probably an exhausting experience.

an orthopoxvirus upon thee!

Every time I quote Happy Gilmore I feel old, because no one knows what I'm talking about. This happens a lot because every time my fingers hurt while taking notes, I say to myself, "Well your back's going to be hurting, cause you just pulled landscaping duty!" And then no one laughs.

In dog beers, I've only had one

Initially, I didn't think we had covered that much material in the last four weeks. I didn't think preparing for this midterm would be so bad. Upon further inspection, however, I have realized that I was very very wrong.

This will be a bittersweet birthday for several reasons:
1. Getting old (bitter)
2. My birthday is on Valentine's Day AGAIN! (bitter)
3. I have a midterm on Monday (bitter)
4. Matt will be here (sweet)

So i guess more bitter than sweet but who is really surprised about that?

the limit does not exist.

I just spent the last 45 minutes reading all my posts from 2006 and reflecting on them. It seemed like a good intermediate year to pick from. There also weren't that many posts. The saddest part was that I used to be funny. legitimately funny. and legitimately really sad. i actually laughed out loud while reading. now i just sit here sad and alone, lamenting the pile of laundry i haven't folded and the lectures I haven't gone through;  and yet, I am completely unwilling to do anything about either of those issues.

I want to believe that I used to handle difficult situations with more grace than I do now even though I know that isn't even remotely true. And that was probably the worst sentence I've ever written. But I'm too lazy to rewrite it. I should just delete it because it is a stupid sentence anyway. There is nothing worse than nostalgic self-absorbed prose. Ok. maybe this huge pile of unfolded clothes is worse. I can see them wrinkling, and yet, I do nothing. It's like the Kitty Genovese of laundry. Yeah. that was really distasteful. But I'm not going to delete that either. Because its the only clever thing I've said in months, I don't care how awful it is.

I used to be witty and now I just complain or cry in my room or watch Property Brothers to avoid studying. My angst used to be so edgy. Who says that? When is angst ever edgy? It is only possible to say that when comparing my then edgy angst to my now obnoxious and intolerable anxiety. That is how awful I am now. My current angst has a 4-fold increase in annoyance when compared to my 2006 angst. Therefore I can conclude that I am currently infected with a humorless and annoying anxiety. and i actually just looked at my virology notes to make sure that was the accurate conclusion to draw from my fake titers of emotion.

If i spent as much time studying as i do trying to come up with funny things to write, I would probably be ranked... exactly the same.

the rest is silence

maybe somewhere else will not be half as cold as me

tiny boat with oars, feather oars.

I hate when people talk to me for the sake of conversation just to prove the existence of some supposed friendship that isn't actually there. I don't need you to come up to me and have an awkward conversation about how my break was. You don't know how it was because we don't talk because we aren't friends. And I am totally fine with that. It really doesn't bother me at all. I actually prefer to eliminate all needless bullshit conversation from my day- let's call it a resolution.

I'm sure you are a great person and I'm sure someone would be lucky to have you around and listen to you constantly complain about how shitty your life is. I have my own internal monologue that bitches enough for the both of us. But I'm not going to gossip about our classmates with you or be bullied by you. Because next week I will turn 27. And I just refuse to participate in this.

Also- vet school is where good taste in music goes to die.

Fastidious and unapologetic.