My family doesn't know me and i guess saying i don't care would be lying. Seeing the close relationships that some people have with their parents is just bewildering to say the least, and it makes me more jealous than ever. i can't imagine having a conversation with my mom for the hell of it. just to talk. right. what does that mean? i don't even know what i would say if she instigated a normal conversation. my parents aren't the type to talk for the sake of talking. i'm pretty sure i am. For the last 16 years i have tried, to no avail, to develop a relationship that has at least a minimal amount of depth to it. where did i come from? i'd like to know because i'm nothing like shy and passive mother and i'm not short tempered and permanently angry like my father. posing as a combination of the two would be somewhat of a stretch in my opinion. I feel like in their eyes, Eric and I are more like long term investments and less like their children. this entire post was completely pointless.

i went shopping with lauren today for her turnabout dress and we found a really pretty one at jessica mcclintock, very classic. i hate mine more everyday. i'm asking steve next week. so much for suspense. ha. i found my ideal prom dress.... ill put a link... i might get it, but i'm not really sure about length. i have yet to find the advantages of being tall.

http://www.cbslimited.com/detail.php?vendor=prom_tiffany_designs&style=6459

well there it is hopefully its a working link and everything. oh well. black white. i'm in a really depressed mood so i'll just read grapes of wrath. what a self-esteem booster.