"I'm sort of an atheist. I like Jesus and all, but I don't care too much for most of the other stuff in the Bible. Take the Disciples, for instance. They annoyed the hell out of me, if you want to know the truth. They were all right after Jesus was dead and all, but while He was alive, they were about as much use to Him as a hole in the head. All they did was keep letting Him down. I like almost anybody in the Bible better than the Disciples. If you want to know the truth, the guy I like best in the Bible, next to Jesus, was that lunatic and all, that lived in the tombs and kept cutting himself with stones. I like him ten times as much as the Disciples, that poor bastard."
-catcher in the rye

nothing really makes sense anymore. life, school, the play. things i used to enjoy are now just rehearsed routine and they no longer have my attention. i'm just going through the motions. and what i wonder is, when am i going to stop going through the motions? winter is a depressing season. and my birthday is in 6 days. i'll be 17 and it will be the same as 16 only now i can get into R rated movies. i dont know if i coudl before because i only tried it once and it worked but iw as too scared to try after that. and ya know. fuck this shit. im begining to question whether or not i really want to be rich when i grow up. college is a scary word.,